ouch!
as a child they hurt
and even worse as an adult
my youthful acts of rebellion were rebuked by my parents
their forms of discipline varied upon the severity of my offense
my remorse varied as well
the strong-willed child that I was…
as a teen
my rebellion, attitudes and arrogance -were even worse
some days, terrible
I apologize to my parents often, still to this day
but now that I’m all grown up those seasons of rebellion tucked safely in the past
all is well, or should be, right??
and yet, this week
birthday week
I find myself broken over my attitudes, idle words, crudeness and irresponsible acts
aching with
growing pains..
and these hurt much worse than those of my youth
why?
because now my rebellion isn’t directed towards my parents
but instead towards my Heavenly Father
in the past I’ve made lots of excuses
justified my acts time and time again
watering them down, comparing my “goodness” with the “goodness” of others
deep down knowing the Spirit within me was
uneasy
I ignored the gentle nudges, shushing it, carrying on just as I pleased
asking for forgiveness, sometimes
and yet, not nearly enough
but this season
is different
I don’t want to “shush” it
instead I desperately want to hear what the
“still small voice” has to say
“Follow God’s example in everything you do, because you are His dear children..”
I’m not justifying my acts instead I’m questioning my faithfulness
my authenticity
“For though your hearts were once full of darkness, now you are full of light from the Lord, and your behavior should show it.”
a thought struck me yesterday
God never “clocks out” on us
so what gives us the right to live for Him on Sunday or Wednesdays or on retreat or at VBS
when we’re dressed pretty & polished and then live as we please on
“our time”
the fact of the matter is that
He holds our very next breath in His hand
there is no “my time” “His time” when it comes to our relationship and representation of the Lord
if we claim His name
we should honor Him with every
breath, attitude and action
when we are alone, with family or our very best friends
I recently read
“We should not take witnessing lightly-it is a matter of life and death.”
it’s that serious.
we know not the hour of His return
we just know He’s coming back.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again
I desperately want Him to say “well done thy good and faithful servant”
the sense of urgency
to BE DIFFERENT
SET APART from the ways of the world
is heavy on my heart
please join me
A CALL TO REMAIN FAITHFUL
to be careful not to become so much like the world that no one can tell who you are or what you believe
influence them for Christ —
considering what your life speaks to those around you
without a word spoken
is this easy? no.
is it possible? yes.
will changes be necessary? probably..
will the change(s) hurt? they may.
do it anyway.
“And now, all glory to God who is able to keep you from stumbling, and who will bring you into his glorious presence innocent of sin with great joy. All glory to Him, who alone is God our Savior, through Jesus Christ our Lord.”
love and blessings,
k
Joanne Viola says
Growing pains surely hurt. As I read your post & thought about it, they are so worth every ache. It is the only way to live a life to the full. A life that is not stunted & stagnate. Thank you so much for this reminder. I visited from Desire To Inspire.
Nannette and The Sweetheart says
Wow…I think I wrote this?? Lol…wonderful post! So true in so many ways. My attitudes were the same way in my teens and then lately I know I have been the same way with the Lord at times when I don’t understand why “things” are the way they are! “Why Lord? I’ve given everything up for You! Why is our ministry stagnant? It can’t be anything WE are doing!” Yikes…of course I haven’t said it like that but the thousand of thoughts and mixed up thoughts running through my head all bungled up and confused somehow seem to blame God for my circumstance. Even though I have asked for forgiveness I seem to be stuck in the same thing over and over again. Thank you for this…so timely, Lord help my focus!! It’s not about Me! It’s all about Him and all in His time! Blessings! Love your site ♥
Karmen says
Hi Nannette, THANKFUL we serve a forgiving, SOVEREIGN Savior who loves us in spite of ourselves…Lifting you and your family’s ministry. Life is tough but HE IS FAITHFUL! I appreciate you stoping by :O) Have a blessed evening.
Jamie Roebuck says
Your words to “stand apart” really hit home with me today. Some days, it is SO Difficult. Thanks, Jamie
Karmen says
thank you Jamie, yes! some days are TOUGH! REALLY TOUGH! so thankful He loves us still :O)
Kelsey Ferguson says
Your words resonated deep within my soul this morning. I can relate on so many levels. I pray and strive to live a life that glorifies God that when others look at me they seem Him instead. I know I fail constantly, but it’s the getting back up and trying again that ‘grows’ us even as painful as that may be!
Thank you for blessing me with your words! <3
Karmen says
It’s comforting to know we’re not alone in the battle! Have a blessed day Kelsey..Thanks for stopping by :O)
Marissa says
Love this, what inspiring words you shared. I know I struggle with the idea that I need to keep trying, even when I want to focus so much on where I have failed. I’d love for you to share this with my Cozy Reading Spot… if you’re interested, I’ll see you there!
http://forfunreadinglist.blogspot.com/2013/06/cozy-book-hop.html
Marissa
hsmominmo says
Growing pains – yes, even at my age. I take them as a reminder that I’m on a journey, to a most wonderful heavenly home, but I’m not quite there yet.
Thank you for sharing your words and heart with us. I enjoyed them very much.
Karmen says
The thought of our heavenly home grows a little sweeter with each passing day..Thanks you for your gracious comment. Have a blessed evening.
Sarah says
How you crazy bless so many … thanks bunches for splashing around with us at momma notes. Lacing up for the race … hope you’ll join us in cheering other moms on.
http://www.justsarahdawn.blogspot.com