complete MELTDOWN!

it happened

Cowboy Dan
sister banker
bestie
and
Precious
all predicted it was coming

 

tonight at approximately 930pm
it did

meltdown.

I felt it
coming on
like a freight train

I text sister banker:
“u home?  in bed?

sister:
“home”

“bed? kids down?”

sister :
“Y what up?”

me:
“I need u to come over for a minute.  Come in my bedroom through the  porch door and don’t run over the water meter when u pull in the yard”

she didn’t text back.

she called.

“WHAT”S WRONG!? I’m almost there.”

me:
“we’re all fine.  I just need your help.”

I may have counted to 30
I saw her headlights
go off
as she pulled in the yard.

simultaneously
I heard
Cowboy Dan’s recliner close down
if I ‘ve never mentioned it before …

Cowboy Dan
doesn’t miss a beat!

he knows if someone
has driven in our driveway
opened a gate
been in his barn
driven his truck
or tractor

EAGLE EYES
and can hear a pin drop a mile away.

sister banker
knew
without me telling her
that Cowboy Dan
didn’t know
she was on her way

sister banker
knows
Cowboy Dan
all-to-well (she’s practically him except for the fact that she’s a woman)

she  had turned off
her headlights
before pulling in the yard

intending to go unnoticed

 
he knew she was here

 

simultaneously
she opened one door
he opened another
both to find
me
sitting in a chair
in the middle of our bedroom
crying
like a lunatic

now for those of you
who know me well
you know that
in moment of crisis
I always say:

“laugh or cry?”

tonight
I chose both

why?

well
because
I have
way
too
many
irons
in
the
fire.

transitioning
almost
every area of my life
as I have known it
for the past 12 and a half years

the icing on the cake
was not
the long list of things things that are already under construction

but instead

the fact that  I decided to

secretly rearrange our bedroom
(because I didn’t want to disturb Cowboy Dan who was watching a western)
at 930 PM
after a long
busy day

add:
my attempt
to move (quietly)
our queen sized, poplar bed
5 additional
solid wood pieces of furniture
all
by
my
self……….

for the second time.
(because I am visual & and have to see something in place before I can “like” or not

when my lower back
began to throb

things were headin’ south in a hurry when sister banker arrived…

“have you lost your mind? what on earth are you doing?”

“yes.!…squall..squall…..snub….snub.
I have…
I have a problem…I need intervention.
snub…snub

tears falling like rain

mascara blurring my vision

I grabbed a pair of Cowboy Dan’s undergarments
(THANK GOODNESS they were clean)

slurping and wiping my snotty nose

sister to action
“get up! and hurry!!!!!
we’re getting this furniture against the wall
and YOU
ARE GOING TO BED!!!”

“snub..snub..ok.”

and that’s exactly what we did
in a matter of minutes
the furniture was in place

“now. GO SHOWER! I’m leaving”

me:
“wait…I need to get the drawers from the living room because they were too heavy to carry in the desk~”
(she gave me the “I CAN’t BELIEVE WE ARE DOING THIS” look)

as we began to tippy-toe
into the living room
behind Cowboy Dan’s chair
as he watched his western
never saying a word.

two living room trips later
we were done.

“now!? we’re done!”

me:
“yes,,,thanks sister!!
I love you to the moon and back!”

and just like that I began to
cry
again…

a complete meltdown

wondering if Cowboy Dan liked the arrangement?”

not sure yet
I will let you know when he starts speaking to me again.

hehe…