“Will y’all pray that I won’t be so greedy?”
“so greedy..” As if a dab of greed were okay.
The same lame prayer. The same lame words. The same lame heart. For years. Lame.
The bills didn’t stop because the shopping and charging hadn’t stopped. Day after day I checked the mail. Week after week more catalogs, more bills, more credit card offers. Sundays I would pray the same lame prayer. I wonder what my Sunday school class thought of the twenty year old me? Probably the same thing I did…lame.
And then one day I felt gross. Dirty. So full of shame I thought I was going to throw up. I couldn’t hide any longer.
No more secrets. No more hiding statements. No more hiding packages. I told him everything.
“I have a problem. I’ve lied ,cheated and stolen from us. I have a mister. His name is retail.”
He said nothing.
“I’m a shop-o-holic and I’ve gotten us in a real mess.”
I cried and then I sobbed. You know what he did?
He hugged me and in that very moment he forgave me. I’m certain.
“Love suffers long and is kind… does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; ..but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, hopes all things, endures all things..Love never fails.”
and that’s exactly what he did.
J lived LOVE out loud. He could’ve screamed, cussed or cursed me but he didn’t. He loves me this I know.
I doubt I would have been as gracious.
When we love like Christ loves we recognize problems and failures in people but we don’t lose faith in the possibilities of who they can become..
I’m so very thankful he didn’t give up on me.
Do you have secrets today? Are you living a lie? Do you feel dirty or gross or lame?
Please don’t ignore it. Listen. Confess and turn from it…
Call upon Him in your day of trouble and He will rescue you and you will give Him glory. Ps 50:15
Though the restoration of the choices I made then has taken years -the freedom and forgiveness of my secret sins were immediate.
He’s still workin’ on me
to make me what I ought to be
it took Him just a week to make the moon and the stars
the sun and the earth and Jupiter and Mars
how loving and patient He must beeee…
cause He’s still workin’ on me….
..Father Thank YOU! … Thank you for the love you lived out loud through my husband that day..for forgiving me and setting me free from the bondage of overspending. The lust of the eye is an awful thing. I lift up those who may read this ..Who are hiding, secret sinning…Pierce hearts, change lives through your word. May your unconditional love be experienced in a real way… you know where and who we are and yet you know who we may become..