The best way to finish something is to start.
We could start with how many times I’ve started this post in my head, or we could start with the come-apart I had in the car on the day 14 days ago. Thankfully no children were present, and only the passerby in the parking lot saw me screaming talking to myself.
If you’ve seen Summer School when the character, Chainsaw, overwhelmed with stress grabs his head, while taking a test & SCREAMS at the top of his lungs, “AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! “Tention breaker. Had to be done.”
Anyone in need of a tension breaker?
Yesterday my oldest son declared, “Tomorrow it will only 27 days until Christmas.” Which is precious and absolutely delightful because it is the most-wonderful-time-of-the-year except that it’s ONLY 27 DAYS UNTIL CHRISTMAS!!!! #forcryingoutloud
October was like two seconds, and now we are two days shy of wrapping November raging full throttle into the holiday season.
Ferris Bueller was right. “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.
Which brings me back to my last post- if you missed the video where I hid on my porch and trapped the cat in the bathroom (who has since been hit by a car and gone on to kitty-cat heaven), you could watch it HERE. The video. Not the cat.
In that post, I shared how we dove head first into foster care and discussed a bit about why I was stepping back from speaking events to tend better to the littles God had placed or allowed to visit our home.
A lot has changed since that post. For the sake of privacy & without going into great detail, I can tell you we savored our months as a family of five but now are back to being a family of four. It’s been eleven days since the little one that left us forever changed had to go. We’ve been cherishing sweet memories, and are re-establishing a new normal.
Just yesterday at church I had someone say, “You’ve walked this road before.” Speaking of years ago & our seasons of grief after we lost our son and then a daughter to preterm labor.
“Yes and no,” was my tearful reply.
Yes, we have experienced loss and sorrow before but none like this.
It’s different.
We, meaning our whole extended family, store family, church family loved hard and fell fast for the little one God sent our way that we were sure would be with us forever until he wasn’t.
Many have said, “Well, this is part of it.” Meaning loving and losing is part of fostering.
To that, yes, it’s very much like standing in the road and then being surprised when you are hit by a car but can anyone ever be ready to be hit by a car?
A recent & frequently asked question,
“Now what?”
WE GIVE THANKS.
Thanksgiving was bittersweet. We dressed as we do on Thanksgiving Day as Pilgrims, Indians and cowboy outlaws.
We hooked the buggy and rode to the feast.
We said the blessing,
ate lots of food, played whiffle ball with family and friends, laughed a lot & then, we cried for the ones who were missing.
“In everything gives thanks” doesn’t happen by accident. When life knocks the breath out of you and our hearts break we have to CHOOSE thanksgiving sometimes even on Thanksgiving.
WE TRUST.
We are trusting God to make it all matter. My nephew told his mother the evening after he heard our news, “Some days are happy. Some days are sad. This day is a sad day.”
Romans 8:28 is one of our go-to verses. We believe God works all things for good for those who love Him, those whom He has called according to His purposes. That doesn’t mean all things are good because there are many, many things in this life that are not good but God in His wonder, and amazing grace can use those things too. He can and will use it for our good and His glory.
Other questions:
“Will you continue to foster?” Yes.
“How are your boys?” They’re tough. Kids really are resilient. We talk, cry and remember. They’re getting better each day.
Now, a question for you that challenged me recently,
“What do you do when you #PrayBig and the things you want to happen don’t?”
For many the holiday season is anything but jolly. Do you wish you could skip Christmas, New Years and Valentines Day? Maybe you have recently been dealt a hard hand. Perhaps you’ve experienced loss or disappointment. Maybe this will be your first season without someone you love dearly. Are you broke? Have you been praying for the same thing for a long time and feel like it’s falling on deaf ears? Has your prayer been answered but not the way you wished it had been?
Today if you are lonely, tired, sad, weary, confused, downtrodden, & dreading the holidays…
My hope and challenge for you is this-
PRAY ANYWAY.
Pray through.
Pray hard.
Pray believing God hears you.
Pray knowing He cares.
Pray out loud or quietly into your pillow.
Pray in your car.
Pray His Word.
Pray with friends.
Pray in a text or on paper.
Pray often.
Pray sad.
Pray happy.
Pray with plenty.
Pray in need.
Pray for others & yourself.
Pray surrendered to His will.
#PrayBig
always and until Jesus comes.
much love,
P.S. Because y’all know I love a P.S. and because I want to say,
“Thank you. To the thousands who have watched this video I recorded the day after the court ruling. I chose to record this unedited, unfiltered, no makeup on video because it’s real life. To the many who have shared this video, to the hundreds of you who have taken the time to whisper a prayer for us, sent us messages and words of compassion–>We are eternally grateful for you!! By God’s grace, we choose joy and pray God blesses you for blessing us.”
