My heart and mind were playing tug o’ war as I left to go pick up sister banker’s school kids.
The cowboy and the rascals left the yard sale for home, or so I thought…
Had I made the best decision? Is one more excavator or backhoe or tractor really THAT big of a deal? It was in mint condition. THAT’s the kind of toys I want him to have. They last.
No. You made the best decision. The lesson, if you don’t have the money, you do without until you do. Stop second-guessing yourself. Not getting THAT toy will give him time to think and reflect on ALL that he does have
You get the idea, right?
I wrestled, back and forth, as I waited for the bus.
The bus finally arrived; I delivered sister’s kids safely home and rushed home to get ready for my date with the cowboy.
As I pulled into the driveway I saw the screen door sling open to a WIDE EYED-SMILING-EAR-TO-EAR BOY holding a BRAND-NEW-DIE-CAST-BACKHOE-STILL-IN-THE-BOX.
Remain calm. I told my sticky from the humidity, mentally exhausted, given it my darndest to teach the stinkin’ life lesson self as I prepared to exit the car. Remain calm. Don’t snap. My face must have said what the trapped words on the other side of my lips couldn’t.
As the WIDE EYED-SMILING-EAR-TO-EAR BOY began to wilt, the cowboy appeared.
My eyes must have whispered (subtly-I’m sure. not.) as he followed me past the smiling boy with no money to the backside of the house.
Stay calm. c-a-l-m.
“Did you buy that toy for him?”
“Yes, why?”
“Did our son, by chance mention our all-the-live-long-HOT-HUMID day-conversation??? About how if you don’t have the money to buy something- you don’t get it????”
“No, he didn’t.”
“Okay, well I’m trying not to snap but I really want to snap because all-the-live-long-HOT-HUMID day-I have been talking our little boys through the life lesson of if you don’t have the money then you don’t get the treasure only to come home to find the said treasure in the hands of the little boy with no money!……… Please help me not to snap. I know you didn’t know but now you do-so.help.me.not.to.snap.”
“Okay, I’ll handle it from here,” was the cowboy’s calm, confident reply.
I stayed at the back of the house until I heard the front screen door close. I could see them walking and talking on their way to the barn.
I talked myself down from snapping as I readied for our date.
After the barn chores were complete, both boys and the cowboy came back inside and informed me that the still-in-the-box-backhoe would belong to the cowboy until the boy with no money could pay for the said treasure..
Problem solved.
Over the last week, the boy with no money has been eager to help around the farm. He’s been busy: cutting weeds, working in the garden & taking out the trash- working hard to pay for his treasure that awaits him.
So this year, we’re taking more than a few used but new-to-us treasures home from the world’s longest yard sale. We’re taking home and reflecting upon the importance of:
>Hard work pays
>Communication between daddy and momma is essential
>Saying no to some good things so you’ll be able to afford the GREAT things
PS. If you are a parenting-pro and already have these things mastered, can I come live with you?
love y’all
J k
PSS- This particular life lesson is one I still wrestle with personally. I have been open to share my impulsive mistakes with our boys and others in hopes that they will not have to suffer the consequences of overspending as I have. It’s a hole that takes a LONG time to dig out of …
PSSS- What’s been the hardest lesson(s) for you to learn?
I have been on that bridge before… I think there isn’t a parent who doesn’t share that lesson. Preparation for that lesson is another thing. Yep, mommy & daddy must be tuned into each other too. There’s the rub but not hard to find understanding together. God’s hand was there too…. Cowboy and cub needed to come to a “man to man” conversation. A time that they can discuss the lesson and the “why”. It is a wonderful learning experience for both.. And for Mama too! Welcome to the parenting “hands on” workshop. You are doing a great job. You are lifted up.