I distinctly remember the day of my appointment discussing with the sweet, round excited mommies-to-be, “Yep, I think I’m pre-menopausal at the ripe old age of 32.” What a delight I was to be around. (Please note my love for sarcasm.)
I know they thought I was a lunatic. Their eyes said so.
At last, it was my turn. The nurses and I had become great friends through the years. I frankly discussed the fact that I had taken the ten pills that were to help me start and yet had still not cycled.
When she asked, as she had a blue zillion times before,
“Have you taken a pregnancy test?”
I laughed out loud, and replied,
“Are you having an off day? This is me we’re talking about. The no-period-never-ovulate-at-the-same-time-can-not-get-pregnant-without-medicine-girl. I haven’t taken any Clomid, because I haven’t had a cycle so there’s absolutely no way I’m pregnant. You know that.”
“Let’s try one,” she said.
“Try what?”
“A pregnancy test.”
“It will be a wasted test but whatever you say dear. You’re the boss.”
Before I could get my hands washed and back to my chair from the restroom she said with a smile, “Karmen, you’re pregnant!”
I laughed out loud.
“No I’m not. You must have stuck that test in the wrong cup.”
Her polite and firm reply, “You’re as pregnant as anybody else I’ve seen today.”
As sincere and as stern as I could be I suggested, “Why don’t you do another test just to be sure…and this time I will bring the cup to you so that I can watch you and witness the results first hand.”
She laughed and appeared to be quite humored with my persistence.
And then, just like that, there was a “+” sign.
She was absolutely, POSITIVELY right.
“You’re pregnant!!!!” I was without breath.
“It’s going to be about an hour and a half before the doctor can see you. Are you okay to wait?”
“Um yes. I will wait. It’s going to take me that long to catch my breath.”
I was winded. Really, really winded. Pregnant? What?
******
That was six years ago.
We heard a great message yesterday discussing the good and bad things of life and how we can make sense of it.
“The good and bad things of life run on parallel tracks.”
As he spoke, I visualized a train track.
I pictured the two tracks that run long way and the short parallel lines that lie underneath that appear to go back and forth, back and forth.
He spoke of Joseph.
As we listened and read through some of the bad things that happen to Joseph or what appeared to be bad and yet were good because they lead to better things or spared him from worse.
He encouraged with one of my favorite verses,
“And we know ALL things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:28
***
Which leads me back to the story we started with. I went to the doctor that day feeling broken.
“My body doesn’t work right.” -bad
Only to discover I was PREGNANT. -good
Except, that meant bed rest for another six months. -bad
At the end of that six months, another baby. –good
THIS is life.
The yo-yoing of good and bad.
May I reiterate?
Last week in our neck of the woods:
Computers crashed at the store -bad
Boys and I had a much better week of home school -good
Dishwasher broke, again -bad
Ordered the part online, and the cowboy fixed it without having to call a repair man-good
House was clean –good
Yard appeared abandoned –bad
Within 48 hours, I heard of one precious friend who had lost a baby and another who was expecting.
HOW DO WE MAKE SENSE OF IT ALL?
Hold fast to what we know.
KNOW the God in heaven, who created the moon and the stars and knows the freckles on your face and the number of hairs on your head,
HAS A PURPOSE AND A PLAN for your life.
HE IS AT WORK.
If you know Him as your personal Lord and Savior, HE IS WORKING ALL THINGS FOR YOUR GOOD AND FOR HIS GLORY.
And if you don’t know Him,
KNOW THIS:
“For GOD so LOVED THE WORLD, that He sent His only begotten Son that WHOSOEVER BELIEVETH IN HIM SHOULD NOT PERISH but have EVERLSTING LIFE.
HANG ON dear ones.
KEEP FIGHTING the good fight..
LIFE is hard and all things aren’t good, but
GOD IS FOR YOU and HE IS FAITHFUL.
much love,
I am touched in my spirit every time I think of this time in your life. You are one strong cookie. You know you are blessed.
Karmen,
The RR track analogy is perfect. One note – if you stand on the tracks and look down the line, the tracks appear to merge!!
Nice insight Brent! Thanks for your encouragement!
I needed that today . This day has really been tough for me but I know God is for me and everything will be alright. Karmen your blogs are great and I love reading them. You’re an awesome writer. Love ya, Linda Burgess
I appreciate you Linda! Your are so loyal and such a great source of encouragement…OH, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!
I stopped in on just the right day. Such encouraging and needed words. Thanks for stopping by my blog 🙂
and thank you! I am grateful for your encouragement 🙂
Karmen, beautiful post and words! It’s a struggle so many people have, how to make sense of the bad and the good co-existing. We will never understand hear on earth, but I love what you said about holding on to what we know – God. Lovely!
Hey friend! Thank you for your kind words…Too often we are faced with too many questions. I have found this practice, of focusing on what I do know, to be a very beneficial practice….Have a blessed day Courtney