Karmen Smith

the world's longest yard sale + life lesson PART TWO

by |

My heart and mind were playing tug o’ war as I left to go pick up sister banker’s school kids.

 

The cowboy and the rascals left the yard sale for home, or so I thought…

SONY DSC

 

Had I made the best decision? Is one more excavator or backhoe or tractor really THAT big of a deal? It was in mint condition. THAT’s the kind of toys I want him to have. They last.

 

No. You made the best decision. The lesson, if you don’t have the money, you do without until you do. Stop second-guessing yourself. Not getting THAT toy will give him time to think and reflect on ALL that he does have

 

You get the idea, right?

I wrestled, back and forth, as I waited for the bus.

 

The bus finally arrived; I delivered sister’s kids safely home and rushed home to get ready for my date with the cowboy.

 

As I pulled into the driveway I saw the screen door sling open to a WIDE EYED-SMILING-EAR-TO-EAR BOY holding a BRAND-NEW-DIE-CAST-BACKHOE-STILL-IN-THE-BOX.

 

Remain calm. I told my sticky from the humidity, mentally exhausted, given it my darndest to teach the stinkin’ life lesson self as I prepared to exit the car. Remain calm. Don’t snap. My face must have said what the trapped words on the other side of my lips couldn’t.

 

As the WIDE EYED-SMILING-EAR-TO-EAR BOY began to wilt, the cowboy appeared.

 

My eyes must have whispered (subtly-I’m sure. not.) as he followed me past the smiling boy with no money to the backside of the house.

 

Stay calm. c-a-l-m.

 

“Did you buy that toy for him?”

 

“Yes, why?”

 

“Did our son, by chance mention our all-the-live-long-HOT-HUMID day-conversation??? About how if you don’t have the money to buy something- you don’t get it????”

 

“No, he didn’t.”

 

“Okay, well I’m trying not to snap but I really want to snap because all-the-live-long-HOT-HUMID day-I have been talking our little boys through the life lesson of if you don’t have the money then you don’t get the treasure only to come home to find the said treasure in the hands of the little boy with no money!……… Please help me not to snap. I know you didn’t know but now you do-so.help.me.not.to.snap.”

 

“Okay, I’ll handle it from here,” was the cowboy’s calm, confident reply.

 

I stayed at the back of the house until I heard the front screen door close. I could see them walking and talking on their way to the barn.

 

I talked myself down from snapping as I readied for our date.

 

After the barn chores were complete, both boys and the cowboy came back inside and informed me that the still-in-the-box-backhoe would belong to the cowboy until the boy with no money could pay for the said treasure..

 

Problem solved.

 

Over the last week, the boy with no money has been eager to help around the farm.   He’s been busy: cutting weeds, working in the garden & taking out the trash- working hard to pay for his treasure that awaits him.

 

So this year, we’re taking more than a few used but new-to-us treasures home from the world’s longest yard sale. We’re taking home and reflecting upon the importance of:

 

>Hard work pays

>Communication between daddy and momma is essential

>Saying no to some good things so you’ll be able to afford the GREAT things

 

PS. If you are a parenting-pro and already have these things mastered,  can I come live with you?

 

love y’all

J k

 

PSS- This particular life lesson is one I still wrestle with personally. I have been open to share my impulsive mistakes with our boys and others in hopes that they will not have to suffer the consequences of overspending as I have. It’s a hole that takes a LONG time to dig out of …

 

PSSS- What’s been the hardest lesson(s) for you to learn?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Is it OK to let them be afraid?

by |

Clouds unnerve him. Heavy rains torment him. And no, I’m not speaking of our crazy, nervous dog (that’s another post for another day.)

 

I’m speaking of my son.

 

Last night, or wee morning rather, I heard the whimpering as he stumbled around to my side of the bed.

 

With my eyes closed I assured him, “You’re fine son, go back to bed.”

 

“My leg hurts Momma.”

 

You’re fine son, go back to bed.”

A few moments later I slumbered from my bed to be sure he’d made it back to his bed. When he rounded the corner from the restroom, he saw me.

 

“My knee Momma!”

 

“It’s not your knee son, it’s the rain and there’s absolutely no reason for you to be afraid.”

 

Slumped shoulders, overwhelmed with anxiety, he turned towards his room. His eyes pleading with me, “Please make it stop Momma. Make the rain stop! ”

 

As he climbed into bed and I began to tuck him in again, I assured him, “You’re fine son. God made the rain and the sun. He loves you and will keep you, always. Think about Jesus instead of the rain. Sing about Jesus. Say His name. Ask Him, ‘Jesus make me brave.’ I love you son. Goodnight.”

I knew, left alone, on the other side of the door, the battle was on.

 

The spiritual tug o’ war within his tiny little soul, to be scared or to be brave.

 

The choice was his to make.

 

I returned to my bed and began to pray for him.

 

“Be near him Lord Jesus, be near. Help him to be brave. Calm his anxious heart Lord, as only You can. Amen.”

 

When an unexpected battle broke out in my room.

 

He’s scared. Don’t you care? A good mom would lay down with him and sing him back to sleep. A good mom would have just let him sleep in her bed just for tonight. It’s just one night. He’s only six.

Once more, I began to pray.

 

“Be near me Lord Jesus, be near. I know you hear me and care for me. I lift my little one up to You. I know that You are all he needs. You will never leave him, nor will You ever forsake him. Father, I love You and trust You…”

 

When I noticed something, just before I said, “Amen.”

God had heard and answered our prayers by the ceasing of the rain.

fearnot

 

 

Is it okay to let your kids be afraid?

Yes, I believe so.

 

Here’s why.

 

J and I are not always going to be here for our kids. We disappoint them. We are inconsistent, lose our cool and to be quite frank, we bomb this whole parenting thing WAY TOO OFTEN.

 

If, then, we are not steadfast and are limited as to what we can do for our kids then there must be One who is better, more trustworthy?

 

Yes, His name is Jesus.

 

He does not disappoint.

He never grows weary.

He does not change.

His way is best.

 

His word tells us to cast all of our cares upon Him, for He cares for us.

 

He cares that my son is afraid of the rain.

 

I believe, with all of my heart, the most valuable lesson I can offer my son is to exhort him to surrender his fears to the One who says,

 

“Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you.” Isaiah 41:10

 

He is the One who can speak, “Peace, be still” and the wind and the sea obey Him.

 

My son needs Jesus, more than my son needs me.

 

Life is stormy.

 

Storms with thunder others with lightening, storms of life, many of which we will have little or no control over.

 

It’s best that they know, there is only One who can calm the storms of this life.

 

His name is Jesus.

love y’all

🙂 k